Dan's Guide to Enjoying your crab with Dignity:Stopping short of wearing kelvar to eat your crabs, here are some simple ways to enjoy that piece of garbage while retaining some form of dignity.
1. Reserve the entire restaurant so that only your family and the waiter is there to witness your horrible gorging and pawing.
2. Buy crab sticks
3. Take away.
4. Get a boyfriend or Girlfriend, seriously. It's their job.
5. Make a game out of it and con your little cousins into shelling crab for you.
6. Do not wear long sleeves white shirts.
7. Act like a starved up monster, that way, people don't bother if you eat like crab ~ heh, that, or you can wipe your mouth and your hands every few seconds and appear dainty.
8. Master chopsticks, till grade 8, the point where you can apply pressure to a 'chi' spot on the crab shell thus disintegrating the shell into non-existence.
9. Skip the crab dish.
10. Request that the chef crack the shell before serving it up.
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Anyways, i'm thinking on insurance...not that im afraid of getting run over accidentally, or breaking my limbs in a maths test, but rather for the interest rate. But of course, 'sicko' and my parents have made me come to dread the insurance shit.
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Anyways, I've bought art stuff!!! and it made me appreciate Mark, yeah i know, without his art friend membership card, i paid $84++ for canvas and paint omggg.
Anyways, im gonna work on my art project, probably mount it in the house or sell it online. I mean, i can finally satisfy my artsy side and benefit from it! My dad said he'll pay for my art materials if its used for decos and if i sell it online, i'll do a minimum of 100-200 dollars for it. heh heh. Im not saying im good, but i think its worth that much. But i'll post pictures on the painting process.
heh heh heh, gonna meet my insurance agent tomorrow, meet the gang for dinner. Do art and attempt homework. ouh well. attempt homework, yeah right.
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